THE STARS TELL ME WHAT TO DO

May 29, 2006
So many fascinating ideas could have come your way over the past few days, Jennifer, that your mind is spinning. Some of what you heard could be so radical that it'll take some time to make sense of them. You could also want to memorialize your thoughts, perhaps by making some notes, or more formally, by writing an article. Watching TV might get your mind off it all and allow you to relax a little. Go to it!

Fascinating Idea #1: people who come camping illegally, ditch their stuff which is then siezed (some of which is baaad), then come back the NEXT weekend and want to camp in the same spot, telling the staff that they "really liked it here." (something to ponder)

Fascinating Idea #2: people that mass to Whyte Avenue to celebrate the Oilers victories. people of all ages, shapes and forms, people with instruments, people with dogs, people with small children (??!!,) people dancing, people drinking and smoking pot, people in Oilers gear hi-fiving, shooting off mini fireworks and having a good time. people NOT in Oilers gear climbing trees, light poles, traffic lights, bus shelters, cars, telephone booths, trying to break off street signs, lighting bonfires on the Avenue. (IS there a way to separate the good celebrants from those plainly bent on destruction and willing to adopt any guise to do so? Maybe shaking the crowd vigorously. Or a centrifuge.)

Fascinating Idea #3: there are relationships out there in which the participants get along well, are able to plan activities and follow through without argument, are able to live separately and enjoy the time they have together, to be together without jealousy and suspicion about time spent apart, to care about someone without worrying obsessively about what bad thing they've done/gotten into while you were not around, having both participants express mutual admiration and respect and not focusing on the negatives... (do these things actually LAST????)

Fascinating Idea #4: the Edmonton Oilers are only 4 wins away from the Stanley Cup.

Fascinating Idea #5: I can do whatever the hell I like with my life and it doesn't matter what others think or want. When it comes down to it, I am the one it affects. No one else out there should be telling me why not. It should be only me saying why. (now... what to do....)

Now the stars have told me to go watch some tv... I wonder if going to a movie would help? Maybe playing some FFXI... the next two are my days off and I intend on making the most of 'em! :-D

A Funny Thing Happened to Meon the Way to the ...

...kiosk. I saw a couple of beautiful Canada Geese beside the parkway and slowed down just in case, knowing full and well that birds are not all that bright and often run/fly/take off right into traffic. As I passed the magestic duo...

...the gander opened up his lousy black beak and hissed at me. I'm sure I could see his rotten pink tonsils. How's that for gratitude? (>.<) Next time I'll just blow by the suckers and make their feathers inside-out. So there!

Amusing.

Hey I've found a couple of amusing blogs:

lamlamsisterhood.blogspot.com is fun and where I found a really funny dance video

bannable-offenses.blogspot.com is only comprehensible if you play ffxi but omg it is SOOO funny. I laughed my buns off here in the kiosk. [GM]Dave gives a bright new perspective on dumbass players online.

In other news, Game 4 of Round 3 is tonight: possible sweep for the Oilers. We'll see. I am cautiously optomistic. The guys could use a day or four to rest- hopefully the Eastern Conference final goes to 7 games.

I am annoyingly sick again and it's raining and the radio here is playing 70% static, 30% music....... but it's all good in the hood. :) My mental health is par excellence and I am at ease.

OH EHM GEE!

I was just idly surfing the net and found a horoscope site. Check out what it gave me for today!! (Then read the blog I wrote a few hours ago!!)

May 20, 2006
Be prepared for an emotional backfire that is likely to take place today if you become too possessive with your romantic partner, Jennifer. Issues regarding freedom versus commitment are apt to arise today whether you are involved in a close relationship or not. Perhaps these feelings are simply of an internal nature, and you yourself are trying to figure out your position on the matter before you proceed.

Hmm... yea astrology sure is hooey. TAKE THAT, SKEPTICS!!!

WHIRLWIND! \(@.@)/

BUSY, busy, BUSY week!

Started back to the full-time job. Re-learning and remembering takes a lot out of a person. Got my first sunburn of the year this week. Hand is still sore, but apparently I'll live.

Been fantastic having an apartment to myself, to do what I choose and to throw my things down wherever. Been very lonely. Dude's been over a couple of times to keep me company etc. Poly and Louis both slept beside him (!). He hates my bed, which I can understand, because it is in rough shape and he hangs off the end by like, a foot. Meh, w/e, it's more incentive to get a new one. Not that I'm re-arranging my life to suit him, because I still am unsure of the status of our ... relationship (?). He told me some REALLY personal stuff last night and things like that always add a new spin to relationship dynamics. I guess I can assume that he feels comfortable telling me about difficult things. (Which is ... good?) I don't know. I'm still kind of happy being in an emotionally shallow give-and-take situation. The responsibility is minimal and if he's being stupid/has pissed me off I can just ignore him and skip the guilt trip. I genuinely do care about him but not with that heart-and-soul destroying potential.

Anyway, been busy with work and with playoffs (7 wins to the cup for the Oilers!!) and will continue to be so for the forseeable future.

Change Time!

Soooo.... today is the last day I will have my X living here. Tomorrow he gets his new place. Most of his stuff is packed in boxes and will be gone by the time I get home from work tomorrow.

Even though we have been finished for a long time and we've both moved on it is still hard to see him go. I've depended on him for love and support for four and a half years and man, that's a tough habit to break. Even with things being as they have been; at the end of the day we were both still here for each other to talk to. I'm going to miss the companionship most.

(And the computer. /cry I don't know WHEN I'll be back online, so my blogs will have to have a little vacation, I guess. :-( )

Well my cat, Louis, tells me that we'll be fine and we'll have way more fun when A is gone. I'm sure we will. It will just take a little while to get used to a quiet apartment and to paying all the bills by myself. lol At least no one will be spilling pink Kool-Aid on the carpet anymore!

Well anyway, reader, that's all for now. Maybe next blog I'll have pictures of my flowers and I'll be able to tell my amazing story of how I got hurt at work. It's a doozy! :D

Rain Again.... sigh

Today is a dreary day. My apartment is very dim. I am typing this with one hand because the other has been broken. My head is pounding too due to a very minor concussion. Let me tell you- two days of a raging headache gets old. Injuries: work-related. I am not too upset about it but it's an inconvenience.

Saw M:I:III last night. Despite my natural reaction of eeeeyyyyeeeuugh to anything Tom Cruise, I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed the movie. The supporting cast is awesome and must explain why I liked it. Went with dude and had a nice time but left me with some ???s. I think the problem is that I just don't know what I should be feeling. I've been topsy-turvy all week because it's the last that A will be living here. Lots of tension > sadness > relief > guilt swimming around and clouding issues. Maybe I'll be able to see more clearly next week when I get a little breathing room.

Sweet and Sour

Spent some more time with Dude this weekend. It's so weird dating someone new. You go from a long-term relationship where you can divine the answers from empty air to not knowing anything. And, I mean ANYthing. In a way it's really fun because it's all new and interesting and every situation has a new solution. But, sometimes it's tiring. LOL Sometimes it would be nice to just know.
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Last night I found out that someone I work with has passed away. Really unexpectedly. Naturally I am shocked and saddened... but I also feel guilty. You see, this person was known in my circle as "Mean Matte." She could be a very nice person but she was also known to be really mean and nasty for no apparent reason. Matte and I had our ups and downs, that's for sure. I feel really bad because maybe I should have tried harder to get to know her, to bite my tongue when she wasn't nice to me. I'm really hoping to go to her funeral so I can see the other side of her- maybe she was a happier person away from work; away from snippy little things like me. I know that I didn't have a big impact on her life or subsequent death and maybe I am fooling myself into thinking that her funeral will give me peace but....... I just don't know what else to think.

AAAAAHHHYEEUUGH!

Yea I'm sick again. I feel like calling some 1-800 number and ordering an I.V. drip of hot tea and a MEGABOXX of 'facial tissue.' Man, if I am ever rich, I'm going to manufacture tissues called NOZEBLOWS. Let's call it what it is, people. Anyway, #%^@ me, I feel like crapola. I guess it's cool though- I mean, why would I want to be well on a day that's supposed to be 24 degrees (C) and also the weekend kickoff? Meh. It's much more impressive for Dude to see me with a red nose, scratchy throat and ALWAYS running nose. I can't even bitch away my malcontent on FFXI because I haven't begged my family for a credit card # so I can get hooked back up. Something about pride and being 29 and wanting to play an online video game.... LOL Maybe my new 'bro' (X) will take pity on me and hook me up. I shouldn't have said no yesterday when he offered. Anyway, in other news, I picked up my uniform at the Park yesterday! Found out my good friend is now my boss. Hmm... that could be good AND bad. Hoping to insinuate myself into the campground position (if there is one this year) so I can spend 75% of my time there. Bah. I'm going to scavenge for some food. Maybe then I won't feel so much like pulling the legs off of the next person/pet/bird/whatever that happens my way.

Let's Just Call Him "Dude"

So... as a post-script to the blog about April 21st:

Yea, he DID lose my number. lol Figures. Being the brave and confident (read: big chicken) individual that I am, it only took me until Friday to call him. So we went out. To the river valley. When it was already dark. And cold. .... the good news is that he wanted to call me again on Saturday.

So Saturday was HELLA fun!! Watched the Oilers RULE in Detroit at the BPs at WEM with my friends L and B. We had beer. We had pizza. We had FREE Jell-O shooters every time the Oilers scored! Yay! After the most triumphant game L and I went to see Stick It. That was a fun movie... just about on par with Bring It On. And when I got home? A message from Dude.

He wanted to see me but there was one small problem: he'd taken his cousin to the strippers because R hadn't ever been. He was afraid I'd be angry with him for going. LOL I didn't tell him that I'd always wanted to go, but had never had a good reason. -.^ I. R. EVIL.

Soooo... long story short, we had fun. Then went to a movie Sunday night. (Lucky Number Sleven- VERY GOOD movie, by the way... made me actually like Josh Hartnett.)

That's the update, read it and weep. (Or, actually, read it and cheer... because there's not too much to weep about in here! :-D )